Understanding and applying the words
International self-help programs that support recovery from behavioural addictions, substance addictions, and compulsions are known as 12-step programs. Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), the first twelve-step program, was created in the 1930s and helped people overcome alcoholism. Bill Wilson and Bob Smith founded it. Since then, dozens of other organisations have used AA’s strategies to address a variety of issues, including drug addiction, binge eating, sex, and compulsive gambling. Alcoholics Anonymous: The Story of How More Than One Hundred Men Have Recovered from Alcoholism, which was first published in 1939, contains a version of the suggested twelve steps that are used in all twelve-step programs.
Many different types of addictions, such as alcoholism, drug abuse, and codependency issues, can be addressed with 12-step programs. The 12 Steps and 12 Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) have been adopted and modified by more than 200 self-help organisations, also referred to as fellowships, with millions of members worldwide.
The first three steps are easier to unpack when the language is approachable and solution-focused.
The Responsibility Statement
When an old timer entered a Twelve Step meeting, several friends welcomed him from across the room. He moved to catch up with them but noticed something unfamiliar in many well-known faces.
A solitary, somewhat sullen young man in his early twenties was nose-deep in his iPhone. The veteran had the impression that the young man was either brand-new to recovery or that this was their first encounter.
Some old-timers considered brushing the newcomer aside, wanting to catch up with their pals. The young man could not relate to an “old guy” like him. The group veteran assumed that one of the younger men would approach the newcomer and extend a warm greeting, enquiring whether this was his first AA meeting, and so forth. However, the older man recalled the AA Responsibility Statement, so he sat beside the younger man and started talking.
We Owe It to Other Alcoholics Who Desire Sobriety
These days, groups are reciting the AA Responsibility Statement in increasing numbers of meetings: “I am responsible, when anyone, anywhere reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that: I am responsible.”
However, saying something is one thing; living it is quite another.
The young man admitted that he had never heard of recovery or the Steps before and that this was, in fact, his first AA meeting. He was not happy about his girlfriend’s insistence that he try out AA, he told the old-timer.
The veteran had heard that song somewhere before. He most likely would have experienced it himself.
“How does sobriety work?” the young man asked the seasoned veteran.
The young man was desperate, and the old timer sensed it. He needed to hear something more than “It works just fine.” The young man was prepared to run out the door if given the chance. It would not work if he was told to stay and figure out the answer for himself.
The veteran thought about how serious the situation was. He was aware that a single encounter could determine whether the young man chose to try sobriety or relapse into alcoholism.
After a short while, the veteran explained how everything fits together: “It works through the combination of two things: the fellowship and the program within the Twelve Steps.”
But the veteran could feel the young man’s needs once more. In addition to talking about his predicament, he needed to hear an older man’s firsthand account of everything related to the Twelve Steps. Thus, the veteran kept things easy and began with the first three Steps.
The First Three Steps in Plain English
The wise veteran understood that the language should be simple and focused on solutions. To make the Steps more practical, he deconstructed them as follows:
Step 1: “Do you believe that your life has gotten out of control because of your drinking or using? Unmanageable, you see, is a five-syllable word that means “out of control.” What does “out of control” mean to you? True? Next, move forward.
Regarding helplessness, it’s the same idea. A few short words that sum up what happens when I take drugs or drink alcohol: things get out of control. If you can relate to the helplessness, you’ve successfully finished the first Step.”
Upon witnessing the young man grasp the concept, he proceeded to Step 2.
Step 2: “We cannot ‘cure’ our addictions, which is the fundamental tenet of Step 2.” You cure malaria or tuberculosis, not addiction. On the other hand, if you can identify with something being “out of control,” you’re in the right place to get help.
“Sobriety is not a prison for those in Twelve Step recovery. Other approaches to sobriety are effective for other individuals. However, if you stick with us, you might find a solution that works for you. What we have works for us. Despite acknowledging that we can’t “cure” our addictions, we showed up to meetings. “Came to believe: We saw that something outside of ourselves can help us, whether that ‘ something’ happens to be a Higher Power (however we define it) or even the 12 Step program itself.” “Came to realise: We realised that we were unconsciously living life, not realising how much damage we were doing to ourselves and others.”
The seasoned recovering alcoholic continued to Step 3, reviewing each Step in detail.
Step 3: “There’s a story in the first Big Book edition where Bill Wilson, one of the co-founders of AA, tells a newcomer, ‘Your life is certainly jumbled up. Would you think about asking God to help you sort it out? That’s it when it comes to Step 3. By embracing a spiritual program for stopping alcoholism and addiction, we accept the spiritual assistance provided by a Higher Power. In Bill’s words, there’s an avenue forward by allowing a Higher Power to ‘unjumble’ what we’ve managed to jumble.
With one final closing statement, the veteran said, “That’s all we do in 12-step programs.” Through the Steps and the fellowship, we discover the Power to ‘unjumble’ our lives deep within ourselves.
This strategy continues to be effective for novices and seasoned users, regardless of age. Because of this, sobriety is transferred from one person to the next through a system of mutual responsibility.
*Editor’s note: Person-first language, which highlights an individual’s identity before illness, is much preferred. However, we have chosen to continue using the term “alcoholic” to refer to those who suffer from alcohol use disorders per the founding principles, history, and language of AA and NA.
All we hope to do is convey the essence of the fellowships and speak to people using terms they frequently use to discuss addiction as a disease.
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